We Will Be The Hopeful

Posted on by mperegrym

“We will be the hopeful.”

I cannot be more moved by this statement. After the hardest year of my life, I look back and remember most, the moments where all I had was hope to grasp onto. Faith is believing in the things unseen, but without hope, it feels impossible.

We are in a time where everyone is able to post all the “best” things in their life, portraying that we have it all together, are peaceful, joyful and on top. I hate it. It isolates, excludes and is fraudulent. More than ever, we need to be honest and talk about our pain. We all have great moments, but we also deal with broken dreams and hearts and lives. We also live in a time where we are scared. I am. It’s so easy to believe that if I am vulnerable and open, if I make eye contact, if I speak my truth, I will suffer in some form. Maybe that’s true… but am I not suffering if I don’t?

If there’s anything I learned through the shattering experiences of the last year, it was that we always have a choice. Not to escape hard times, or to maybe actually change our circumstance, but to choose how we walk through it. We are all fragile, feel worthless some days, and almost never have it together. Why aren’t we okay with that? If everyone admitted that, we would have a different world.

Hearts. We all long to be seen, heard and deeply known. In order for that to happen, we need to share our stories, share our hurts, be inclusive. We also need to listen. Ask more questions and make less assumptions. Grace. We all need more grace for one another.

I will be the hopeful. I will choose to believe in better things to come, but also, accept that I don’t see the bigger picture all the time. I choose to believe that God is doing a great thing, even now. “Those who put their hope in Him, will not be put to shame.” Does this mean I don’t struggle with shame? Not at all. It just means in those excruciating, humiliating moments when all that I have built or lived for crumbles, that I choose to look up and trust that this isn’t for nothing. I don’t have any more answers, but I do have hope. That was enough to get me to take the next step forward, and then the next…

Some people might be frustrated that I talk about God. I don’t bring Him into this to push onto you. It’s just that I can’t separate my story from my faith; I know it sounds cliche but when I look back I see how He has used all the moments for something better. He is the very reason I am standing today and I can’t help but celebrate that. I also celebrate the people in my life who have stood with me through the worst times, where love and fear danced over each other’s lines. Who, watching me grieve and ache, didn’t tell me to move on, but sat with me and also cried. What a gift. You are a gift. We were made for this. Hope. Love. To fight for what is good and pure.

In order to be the hopeful, we must take action. We must use our voice for encouragement, to uphold, to remind others what really matters. We must respect our time here and use it for goodness. We must challenge shame with truth, accepting ourselves for not having all the answers, and pass that relief onto others. You matter, whether you feel it or not. That’s the truth.

So, let’s keep going. Let’s be the hopeful.

Missy&P
To order a “Rookie” shirt or hoodie: store.twloha.com
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33 thoughts on “We Will Be The Hopeful”

  1. What a great statement. I read it and it made me smile (possibly because I’ve also just finished a yoga session so I’m on a yogic high) – hope is all any of us can have. Hope keeps me going and it’s what drives my desire for everything. Hope for a great day, the strength to get through the crap, the future I dream about making a reality. Love this ❤

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  2. As long as you have true friends and family to see you through the hard times and to celebrate the good, that’s all that matters. Even if you feel like there is no one to share your pain, to comfort you, remember that you have your fans and we will always show you love, appreciation and remind you that you are beautiful and kind, that there is someone close to you that you can always go to,to let the pain out that you feel is crushing your heart. Your true friends and loved ones will always love you and be there for you no matter what. We, your fans love you, always. Don’t ever forget you are truly loved .
    P.s. Give Ben a ring, he will always bring joy to your heart and brighten your day, cos really, why wouldn’t he, he’s awesome, your amazing and together you are extraordinary. God bless you beautiful lady.
    Hugs from Louise, Manchster , UK 😉

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  3. I love this and completely agree. Life is horrible at times, there isn’t always light at the end of the tunnel.

    People who post that everything is amazing, exciting, best day ever, all the time are so frustrating. Life isn’t like that, it’s not all sunshine and roses. Some days are awful, most days are just days. Why we feel we can’t be honest I’ll never know. Suffering from depression caused by grief has made me realise just how alone you are made to feel when you can’t smile or be happy, even if you desperately want to.

    Like you say, just be there and let me cry.

    I hope this year is better and you have more days and a few good ones.

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  4. Beautiful, thank you. Thank you for talking about God. Though some people may push back from Him, you give Him credit for your hope and people need to know that. I’m learning the same things and I’m grateful to hear your story. May we learn bravery and hope through the steady love of God.

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  5. Love this so much! Hope, in spite of circumstances that may seem to mock that hope, is contagious and gives life to everyone around you. Incredible post Missy.

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  6. Missy, what a beautifully written piece. The things you wrote about are things that concern all of us. And those of us who can share our grieve and ache with the people around us are beyond blessed. I am greatful to hear there have been these people in your life who stood with you in times when you ached and grieved. I sometimes send you tweets with a message of the hope you are talking about that is also connected with my faith in God as you describe it being intertwined with yours, to encourage you even though we do not really know each other. In these times I often get scared for the world and for the people in it. Thanks for this reminder that we should all be hopeful!
    Love, Joanne
    @JoanneVTS

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  7. Missy, after several disappointments, I completely lost faith. But the admiration I have for you, makes me daily to review that decision. You are my inspiration! I hope, one day, be as wise as you. Thank you.
    Sorry for the bad English, I’m Brazilian.

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  8. “Those who are wise shall shine like the brightness of the firmament, and those who turn many to righteousness like the stars forever and ever.” That was beautiful..Thank you so much for your incredible words…May God Bless and Watch Over You Forever…

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  9. I totally agree with your post. In today’s world with social media, all people do is share the high points in their lives and embellish those moments to make their lives appear to always be fantastic and that’s simply not how life works. I’ve had a hard time this past year, and in the midst of it, I had to take a break from social media because all it did was feed a lie that everyone elses’ lives were perfect except for mine. People don’t share their grief and heartache as much as they share their successes because sharing pain is more vulnerable. Sharing pain takes bravery but what a better world it would be if people stopped spreading the facade that life should be perfect all the time…so thank you for your bravery and for spreading hope in hard times! God bless!

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  10. I found this through TWLOHA and I needed to read this tonight. Thank you. I met you several years ago in Vancouver with Ms. Gatto and your golden doodle. I don’t remember what we talked about, but I remember thinking, “this girl gets it, I can relate to her”. Reading this now, I have the same thought. It’s comfortin. It’s hard not to get caught up in the illusion and to be free to speak my truth. There are so many unknowns and fear of the reaction. I do it it small steps, quietly trying to overcome these fears, but one day I hope that I will be free, that I will own my life and my struggle despite my fears and my worry.

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  11. Thank you for sharing and being venerable. I have that Psalm about not being put to shame above my sink so I am reminded of it often. The Lord is near to the broken-hearted that’s such a sweet promise to us. Praying you know His nearness and that He continues to heal you through this hard season.

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  13. Thank you very much for your story. Isaw all the seasons of Rookie Blue. You are a great personality. Love to see you on the show ever time. I think you are a great person. I am from the Netherlands. Thanks very much, Also al the People here who shared what they think. Thank you all. Lots of love Hanneke

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  15. Missy, I love you so much as an actress and love you even more as a fellow Christian! So beautiful how you share your story and God’s love for the world! Thank you! Lots of love and blessings from the Netherlands
    Marije

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  16. Hi Missy,

    Most folks in your line of work simply use social media to promote themselves and their work and that’s fine. People use it to pat themselves on the back and show the universe the fun they are having and that is fine too. However, I love that you have chosen to use it to connect with people. Buddhism has a saying “so live your life that it demands a question,” and that is something I have long since felt you do. You carry yourself in the face of pain with utter grace and class and boundless desire to improve and your willingness, in your time, to share that is truly inspirationAl. I am not a religious person and my feelings about God are challenging, but I always value how strongly you believe and how tangibly you share that with the world. I recently read the open letter Ben Bass sent via Twitter and was blown away by his class and his grace and willingness to share his pain with people, to show that life isn’t easy no matter who you are or how you may be perceived. His willingness to share his vulnerability and your empathy and clarity truly just blow me away.

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  20. Beautiful, profound. Sharing our vulnerability makes us authentic and connects us. I’m proud of you for this post – well done good and faithful servant. Having worked with your father – the heart beauty shining from you, is no surprise. Love on.

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  21. Two nights ago I had a really vivid dream in which I was talking with people from the cast of Rookie. I asked Ben Bass what he was doing after Rookie Blue was over. He said he was going to spread hope. 🙂 Weird dream I thought…then I read this. Perhaps that was you instead…love this!
    Phillipians 3:12-14

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  22. Dear Missy,

    Thank you for writing such a lovely piece. Even though you have experienced many hard things this past year, I do believe none of those things that you passed through were in vain. Through those experiences, I believe the Lord is making you a comfort to those around you. Through your sufferings and hardships, you can relate to those around you and supply others with words of grace.
    Although this year has been difficult for you, I am comforted to hear that you got to know Him more and experience the love of those around you. This reminds me of what the apostle Paul said in Phil. 3:10a. While he was in prison, his desire was “to know Him and the power of His resurrection…” I’ll be praying for you 🙂 that whatever the Lord brings you through, whether good or bad, you would know Him more. God bless~

    Your sister in Christ,
    Esther

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  23. Missy! The last time I saw you (besides on TV) was when you were running around at Wee College at APA. It’s lovely to see you continuing your walk with God. He WILL complete His good work in you!
    Laurie

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  24. Missy I’m so very encouraged by you. Thanks for not pretending and for so openly trusting Him! I will continue to lift you in prayer. Hugs.

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  25. What’s even stranger to me about social media is where people share awesome things about their lives and other people just slam on them, like every successful actor or musician somehow is responsible for all the garbage in the universe and should get a job cleaning toilets at Walmart instead. I really don’t think Jessica Biel with her million followers gives a crap what I think, but the comments some people leave her make me feel ashamed for humanity. Any amount of honesty is a risk in this respect. I don’t watch much TV and therefore only know you from “Stick It” (I related to that character much more than I would to police anyway). I will keep the hope alive for seeing you in a leotard again one day (Ha Ha… sort of…) Peace and a great 2016 for you Missy. May your dreams come true. Keep making us Canadian hosers proud. Jim.

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  26. Missy. This is beautiful. Thank you. A friend of mine once told me, “When you feel like you have to wear a mask to feel loved and accepted, it is the mask, not you, that receives that love.” God is teaching me one day at a time to be brave and tear off the things I hide behind, and I have found so much hope in authenticity. Thanks for being a voice for hope in dark places.
    Steph

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  27. Missy
    Greetings from Africa
    I want to start by saying I love love love your authenticity when you write and this piece really touched my heart because of so many statement that you made in it. As I read your words, the tears are flowing freely. I am crying silently so as not to wake my daughter.

    I rarely post comment to anything, in fact your last article on here was the first time in almost 5 years that I have posted a comment to anything on line

    Last year was a very very difficult and sad year for me as well and it left me feeling so low that I cannot even put into words what I was feeling, but you seem to have put into words some of what I was feeling then. So I say THANK YOU

    One day last year, I just decided to take a break from social media and I can honestly tell you that it was the day I truly began to enjoy my life again. I started using my social media update time to reconnect with myself and spend that time reading the bible, other good books and praying. That was when things began to turn around for me in all areas

    So once again I say Thank You for putting this out there and my prayer for you is that for every minute of pain or disappointment that you suffered last year, you get seven minutes of good fortune, peace, happiness and success back in return. That is 7-fold compensation. Please meditate on these scriptures and pray them over your life Isaiah 43:18-19, Ecclesiastes 9:11, Proverbs 3:4-5 and Matthew 21:22

    God Bless you Missy

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  28. Hope, for me, as been finding ‘new’ lights in the darkness when the old lights were put out. It is surprisingly exhausting having your dearest idols torn from your very heart; silence and doubt become the seed-bed of a hope that carries us when faith itself is not (or barely!) enough.
    Saddened that RB will not continue, but trust your future endeavours will be equally as enjoyable. And if you should find yourself back in Ontario, say, enjoying the slopes at Blue Mountain, you should swing by Jozo’s bar, and ask for Chris. There is an amazing conversation waiting for you!

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  29. I loved this post! On a day where I was feeling low and in the midst of a cry fest, I read this and smiled. It is good to be reminded that even during the dark paths of our adventures that it is still part of the adventure and those moments make us who we are. Faith and not understanding the unknown, but still trusting, continue to bring me through the tears, sadness, fear, and anger. Thank you for the smile when I needed it!

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  30. I’m so sorry forbtjebsorriw you’ve experienced this past year. Very glad you are trusting God even when things don’t make sense. When my husband died and I was left to raise our 8 year old alone, I couldn’t understand how this could be in any way a good thing. How could it be in my daughter’s best interest to grow up without her father. I grieved and was angry, then I finally choose to trust that God is who He says He is. Good, faithful, trustworthy. If He is not, He is a liar and why would I serve Him? Sending you a huge hug, prayers for joy after sorrows.

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  31. First I used to admire you because of your amazing talent, but after reading this and realizing once again the power of God over good people, I admire you the most for speaking up, not only about your Faith in Him, but because you choose to speak your true feelings. Social media is the perfect scenario to show the others our “amazing lives”, when in reality those lives are so far from what they show. I admire you because you are sincere. I feel like I’ve known you for years of watching you in tthe TV, so reading all you wrote makes me happy that you are on your way to overcome your pain.
    Kiss and hugs Missy and the best is yet to come.

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  32. Once you realize that you have a choice in how you react to situations, the power of the moment transfers from the situation back to you. Understanding this doesn’t mean you won’t feel pain or that you’ll always be joyful, but it may increase your chances of seeing a path that can guide you to joy from pain.

    As you said, life can be difficult and full of fear. It’s rarely easy. That doesn’t stop people from trying to make it appear easy, but why waste the effort? This act may fool others for a while, but you’ll never successfully fool yourself. Besides, more times than not you’ll find that the truths in your life are not unique. We all struggle with something. There’s no shame in sharing these things. People are drawn more to what they can relate to than to the mirage they wish to be true.

    You should write more, Missy. You’re good at it. And it’s meaningful to those of us who are trying to relate to the rest of the world. I absolutely love the heart and humor I see from you on Twitter.

    Also, thank you for saying that I matter. You matter, too, Missy. I’m sure as an actor it’s sometimes difficult to know what people truly think of you. And while those of us who see you from afar will never fully know or appreciate your true self, every little bit you do share with us allows us to appreciate you in our own way. That’s part of the beauty in what you do. You can reach out and touch deeply even people who you’ll never know. That’s a great gift full of burden that you possess. One that you handle well.

    Though life has been difficult for you recently, through hope and faith you’ll find your way. We’re rooting for you. Not only to be successful in your career, but we’re also rooting for you as you travel down the path of the hopeful. I know it’s difficult, and I know you didn’t ask to be a brighter light for those who are without hope. But whether we like it or not, the stage of celebrity is more visible than that of others. Use it to shed the light of hope on the hopeless so that they may find the same path. But don’t ever believe you have to fit some perfect mold. Be you…in all your glory.

    Take care of yourself. Know that no matter where you are or what you choose to do, you will always have people who want to see you succeed…but also know that we will be here to support you even if you stumble. God be with you.

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